I won't even mention the early morning I used a climbing stand on a slick popular tree.  The very second I sat down and took the weight off the bottom, it went ticky ticky all the way down to the ground.  Left me sitting way up in the tree with my feet dangling.  

Let me tell you, a old fat guy's legs are no substitute for the bottom part of a climbing stand.

Yesterday I saw Jaime (ishawanabe)  Miss a rabbit and then dive after it coming pretty close.  Funny stuff right there!

Well I know I can't top these but I know i have just as many so I'll start with one quick one. It was the first day of deer season this year. I hopped in the ol '52 Chevy pickup right after work and headed to some public land about hour away. I parked at the first gravel entrance that wasn't occupied, got my gear on & grabbed my bow. Well I parked right by the little sign where Missouri Conservation posts a map and some regulations so I figured I'd take a look, as soon as I started reading out of the corner of my eye I spot a doe walking broadside right behind the '52 (I'm standing at the front fender) So I crouch down take off my boots (boots & gravel not good) I creep to the other fender and got in position for her to walk out from behind the truck,I kneel down, calm down, and ready my bow...........She walks out and ....BAM !!!! An acorn the size of a bowling ball smacks right square on the fat fenderd '52 !!!!....I think I jumped about as high as that doe did...Well I knew then I was in for a fun season.

around ten years ago i was elk hunting in burns.carl and i had called in this great herd bull at least 5 times but he always stopped just out of range,finally we gave up trying to call him in.carl exclaimed he had to take a dump,i dug into my pack for the roll of tp.carl tells me he doesn't crap in the woods...i tell carl its two miles back to the truck...he went down in the pines to do his thing.our bows are lying side by side on two small windfalls.i am waiting on carl when all of a sudden i look up and here stands a nice big fat spike bull,i was shocked,i reach slowly down to my bow..slowly picking it up and removing an arrow as i went,the whole time the spike is staring with great interest into the trees in carls direction.i finally get my bow up..arrow is nocked..i pull back and the arrow falls off the back of the handle.i look at the bow and realize i had grabbed carls bow.i slowly put his bow down and grab mine.the spike is still standing there less than twenty yds away staring mesmerized by what was going on down there in the trees.i heard carl grunting and i was cracking up inside.i pulled an arrow off my quiver..raise my bow while drawing back i reach full draw when i hit my anchor.i hold less than a second and let the shot go exhaling as i did so.....all of a sudden i feel a huge yank on my neck and a burning searing pain in my neck and head..my arrow flew off into orbit.the spike suddenly snapped back into reality and blew out of there doin 60 right in carls direction..i'm seriously thinking i'm dying,carls yelling what the hells goin on up there..what happened was my two cow calls that are on strings around my neck had gotten wrapped in my bowstring when i drew back as i came up with the bow.WARNING:do not attempt this as it can and does cause severe neck pain and welts around the neck.....ow....  :D        :D  carl got a hoot out of it and so did i after the pain subsided.

I've been there myself Elkherder except I didn't have anyone else around to entertain my deer..lol and mine was a grunt tube. Dang those things can hurt you!
God bless,Mudd

Elkherder.......I would pay good money to see a video of that (except for the Carl sound bites).  That had to be a comedy of errors!!

If only elk could talk.............think what he would be telling the rest of the herd!

We have a lot of rock ledges on the hillsides around here, 5'-10' high. I jumped some muley does and they took off up the hill. One of them made an attempt to clear one of those little rimrocks and didn't make it. She went tumbling back down the hill (probably a 45° angle). When she stopped rolling she stood up, shook of the dust,  and I swear she was looking around to see if anybody was watching. Then she bogeyed off in another direction. I know it had to hurt but I guess deer can be clumsy sometimes too. I had to sit and laugh my tail off for awhile.

These are great!

I'm just glad I don't have any stories to share

Years ago when living and hunting east of EU Claire Wisconsin.  I was working along a high moraine ridge.  I stopped to glass the broad valley below at a break in the rocks where I could go up and down by pushing my feet against the opposite side of the crack.  To my left I saw a bear and across the bog and up a bit there was a nice eight pointer.  I struggled across the bog and found where the water was as deep as my neck, and cold too.  I watched trout swim in that deep hole while I planned my stalk on the buck.  However, the buck came down to edge of the bog, probably to hear what all the splashing was about and spooked not 30 yards from me as soon as I hit dry land.  next after the bear.  I stayed on the dry side and slowly I worked up to the tall red pine that I used for a marker. Got there looked down into the bog, no bear.  Went a little further, BEAR ARE FAST, nothing more than a black streak flying through the trees. I found a better place to cross where swimming was optional and headed back to the break in the cliff.  At the bottom I just had to poop before I inched my way back up. I did my business and it was good.  Pulled my pants up and looked up to see two girls looking straight down at me and laughing.  Trying not look embarrassed I climbed up as fast as I could, but when I reached the top they were gone.

hayslope.....that entire 9 days of hunting was a comedy of errors..i started out with 15 arrows..left with 0....shoulda had it all on video,woulda sold a million copies.