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Main Boards => PowWow => Topic started by: kbetts on March 14, 2013, 02:04:00 PM

Title: Frustrated with Dad
Post by: kbetts on March 14, 2013, 02:04:00 PM
My father was fortunate enough to retire at the young age of 56.  The same year, he went and bought himself a 57# Predator recurve in order to get back into archery.  I was excited to say the least, thinking I had found a partner in crime per se.  Fast foward almost seven years later and I bet he's shot that bow less than 50 times.  I know why....its too heavy and has been since day one.  Even after going to league last night (he's gone twice cause he loves the BS sessions but never shoots) and listening to a gentleman his age, who's been shooting his whole life, talk about how he loves his Widow since he had it reduced 8#, he still is stubborn as hell.  He keeps telling me "Next year".  I finally told him he doesn't have a bucket full of "next years" left to do this stuff.  

I just needed to vent.  Anyone else run into this?
Title: Re: Frustrated with Dad
Post by: gringol on March 14, 2013, 02:09:00 PM
i have a 70# bow I bought long, long ago that I refuse to sell, but never shoot.  You might need to just bite the bullet and buy him something lighter on the classifieds.
Title: Re: Frustrated with Dad
Post by: kbetts on March 14, 2013, 02:26:00 PM
Been thinking about that.  I talked to him earlier today and asked him to "trust me" just like he's told me for the last 37 years.  I'd like to keep his Predator (cause I can shoot it lol) and put up something I have for a partial trade towards a decent bow close to 50#.

I think he's sees that I'm not going to let this rest.  There is a strong desire in him to do this, but his pride is holding him back.
Title: Re: Frustrated with Dad
Post by: jonsimoneau on March 14, 2013, 02:48:00 PM
Yea. Get him a 40 lber. Let him shoot it a few times and he will love it. Sounds like the kinda thing my Dad would do!
Title: Re: Frustrated with Dad
Post by: stujay on March 14, 2013, 02:54:00 PM
I'm bout your dad's age and I find a difference between #49 and #44 the 2 LB I own. I highly reccomend a #40-45 bow for him. I can and do shoot both of mine but it is much more pleasant/fun to shoot the lighter weight one! By the way mine are both ILF and one can go up or down later by just switching limbs.
Title: Re: Frustrated with Dad
Post by: kbetts on March 14, 2013, 03:06:00 PM
You know what....I am going to get him that lighter set.  I think about it and really its a small price to pay for all the things he's given me.
Title: Re: Frustrated with Dad
Post by: xtrema312 on March 14, 2013, 03:43:00 PM
Try the lighter set or bow, but be prepared for the possibility that he really is just not into it.  If he had a burning desire to do it, he would have made a change already and be at it.  

My dad did kind of the same thing, but then went to a compound and that collected dust.  Then a crossbow with reluctance and lack of effort to really get that tuned and shooting correctly.  He missed a few deer and  ran a lot off for a couple years.  Now that is collecting dust, and he is just gun hunting.  I am okay with that. It was frustrating for a couple years.  
.
Title: Re: Frustrated with Dad
Post by: SELFBOW19953 on March 14, 2013, 03:48:00 PM
Kyle,

If you need some lighter bows for him to try, let me know.  I may be able to find one or two bows somewhere.  Most of mine are 45# to 60#.  At least your father likes bows.  My father considered them toys and wouldn't let me hunt with one.

Phil
Title: Re: Frustrated with Dad
Post by: will_hunt on March 14, 2013, 03:59:00 PM
I am 56 years old now.  I shot a  63# recurve. for years.  I now shoot a 58# bow. I am having one built in the 53# range in order to shoot A LOT more. The Toby Keith lyric is applicable for hunting "I'm not as good as I once was, but I'm as good once as I ever was". While I can  shoot heavier bows really well--even I realize that the end is in sight for heavy stuff on a daily basis for long periods.
Title: Re: Frustrated with Dad
Post by: trad_in_cali on March 14, 2013, 04:32:00 PM
Can't you get him another set of 40# black glass limbs for cheap?
I'm pretty sure the Predator maker offers them.
Title: Re: Frustrated with Dad
Post by: Guru on March 14, 2013, 04:36:00 PM
Yeah bud, Get him something lighter so he can get out with you and really enjoy it!

I'm thinking of doing the same with my dad....he's got a bow he's had his whole life....but it's time for something lighter so he'll shoot and enjoy it more...
Title: Re: Frustrated with Dad
Post by: Bowwild on March 14, 2013, 05:22:00 PM
It is obvious you care a lot about your Dad. You want him to get maximum enjoyment out of archery.

My Dad has been gone (at age 62) for 17 years. I only saw him shoot two arrows his whole life. Both were shot on different days straight up from our front porch in a sub-division...yikes!  He thought the deer I killed with archery tackle must have been tame, but he always called his brothers when I brought another bow kill home.

I wonder if your Dad has admired any certain model bows?  If so, maybe you could "stumble" upon one of those in a lower weight (40-45 pounds)and it was "the only weight available"?
Title: Re: Frustrated with Dad
Post by: Pat B. on March 14, 2013, 05:29:00 PM
50 is too heavy for someone that hasn't been shooting..

Go with 40-45, IMO..
Title: Re: Frustrated with Dad
Post by: fisherick on March 14, 2013, 05:34:00 PM
Buy him a lighter (42-45#) set of limbs for that bow for Fathers Day and matching arrows.
Title: Re: Frustrated with Dad
Post by: Cyclic-Rivers on March 14, 2013, 06:40:00 PM
I'll be sad when the day comes, my father can no longer come to events and hunts with me.

You have good advice here, but sounds like he just likes to come along for the socializing.
Title: Re: Frustrated with Dad
Post by: LittleBen on March 14, 2013, 07:00:00 PM
I agree with everything said here. Get him a 40#er. He'll love it and shooting it will be easy. Even if he will shoot a 50#er today he won't shoot it tomorrow or next year. 40# will kill a deer if that's your game and will kill targets all day.
Title: Re: Frustrated with Dad
Post by: SS Snuffer on March 14, 2013, 07:27:00 PM
Got to tell ya , I shoot my share of deer but if I had to shoot a 50 lb. bow I would not be having any fun. I'm 62 and hope to be doing this till I'm 80.
Title: Re: Frustrated with Dad
Post by: kbetts on March 14, 2013, 07:31:00 PM
I love this place.

Got off the phone with him a couple hours ago.  New set of limbs it is.  I can hear the "want to" in his voice.
Title: Re: Frustrated with Dad
Post by: njloco on March 14, 2013, 08:26:00 PM
Most important is, get him working out, and I mean working out, I am 63 and have gone up in weight, but I try and work out as much as possible not everyday but often, especially cardio. If you don't use it, you lose it.

Yes, get him  lighter limbs for that bow.

Good luck.
Title: Re: Frustrated with Dad
Post by: kbetts on March 14, 2013, 08:29:00 PM
He's a pretty in shape guy.  He runs and bikes quite a bit.
Title: Re: Frustrated with Dad
Post by: Marc B. on March 14, 2013, 08:51:00 PM
May we all live long enough to aggravate our grown children, and may our children care enough to try to make us happy.

I hope your dad gets into shooting the lighter weight limbs and you have many more great years of shooting together!
Title: Re: Frustrated with Dad
Post by: SELFBOW19953 on March 14, 2013, 09:08:00 PM
Great to hear, Kyle!!!  You won't be sorry!
Title: Re: Frustrated with Dad
Post by: LittleBen on March 14, 2013, 09:18:00 PM
Don't be frustrated with Dad. He won't always be here. Just try to understand what you can do for/with him. My father and I always had a rough relationship, it wasn't until I was an adult we really related. Now I wonder what I will do without him one day. We live nearly 500 miles apart but we talk every Saturday morning. One of the smartest and most honest men I know, even though I know my talkativeness annoys him a bit I try to get him to talk as much as I can. I just think the more we speak the longer I'll remember his voice when he's gone.
So don't be frustrated, instead be committed to doing more together.
Title: Re: Frustrated with Dad
Post by: CRS on March 15, 2013, 09:53:00 AM
Since your Dad like to excercise already, get him some light stretch bands to practice "drawing" the bow.  

There are also many low impact upper body excercises to do that make a huge difference.
Title: Re: Frustrated with Dad
Post by: rustyspike on March 15, 2013, 10:35:00 AM
First I a 57. My normal bows where in 50 plus pound range. I also had 2 45 pound bows. To make a long story short. I had a accident last year so I had no choice but to use my 45's. All in all I have regained the strength to use my 50's. But to tell you the truth I shot the 45's way better.

Unless you are hunting really big stuff. The 45's are they way to go. Yea I have to take it on the chin that I shot my 45 RER LX w/recurve limbs better than my full size RER recurve 50.

Rich K.
Title: Re: Frustrated with Dad
Post by: Bob Palmer on March 15, 2013, 10:58:00 AM
Good job Kyle! It was great hanging out with your Dad at the league shoots!!! We'll get him out for some stump shooting then he will be hooked  :)
Title: Re: Frustrated with Dad
Post by: paoliguy on March 15, 2013, 12:15:00 PM
I hope you have many years to shoot together. I just lost my dad a few weeks ago. I will be shooting his old 50# Bear this weekend as a personal tribute. Wish we could shoot thogether again. Enjoy every single shot you can take together!
Title: Re: Frustrated with Dad
Post by: reddogge on March 15, 2013, 06:28:00 PM
Try the lighter limbs out and if he still doesn't shoot than you have to face it, he's not really that interested. Same as my son.
Title: Re: Frustrated with Dad
Post by: Hud on March 15, 2013, 07:18:00 PM
Good decision, glad to see you were able to help your dad.    :thumbsup:
Title: Re: Frustrated with Dad
Post by: degabe on March 15, 2013, 09:18:00 PM
Enjoy your DADs while you can cause they won't be here forever. Mine has been gone since 1972and I still miss him.
Title: Re: Frustrated with Dad
Post by: Brazos on March 15, 2013, 10:19:00 PM
I bought my dad a HHA Cheetah back in 2005 and he has only shot it once or twice since.  He introduced me to archery and HH when I was a kid.  All those years he talked about how great HH was and how he wanted to shoot a longbow one day like HH.  Well I saved my money and just did it and bought him a HH longbow.  He never has shot it other than the couple times I shot with him.  He is RH and I am LH.  If I could shoot it one day it wouldn't bother me so much but I can't and it was a waste of money.  I don't care too much any more.  He is all ways busy doing what he loves.  If he takes I terest in archery again he has a bow, the arrows I made him, and all the accessories right there ready to go.  In the end what I am saying is if he decides HE wants to do it again then he will.
Title: Re: Frustrated with Dad
Post by: SKITCH on March 16, 2013, 02:29:00 AM
Was thinking about this. Maybe your dad doesn't think a lighter bow is "manly" enough for him based on some past experience or misconception. Maybe you should "just happen" to show him a few hero shots of some nice animals taken with 40-50# bows. Might change his opinion a bit.

Having said that....count your blessings. Wish I had dad around that enjoyed anything I was interested in!!!
Title: Re: Frustrated with Dad
Post by: Shawn Leonard on March 16, 2013, 09:30:00 AM
I would say don't get frustrated with him, enjoy whatever time you spend together. He may come around to a ligthter bow or not, but I recently lost my Dad and anytime together is time well spent. I have a beautiful original Wing recurve that is #40's and if you and your Dad would like to give it a go, you are more than welcome to try it too see if it will have him wanting to shoot more. I would pay for S+H to get it to ya. Have Fun! Shawn
Title: Re: Frustrated with Dad
Post by: Jedimaster on March 16, 2013, 10:47:00 AM
Shawn is right on. He may not love archery but he loves you! That's good enough. Maybe his interest in archery is just an expression of his interest in you. Crazy but sometimes we dads want to be accepted in our sons worlds.

In short, he may never have the passion for archery you have but there are a thousand other ways to enjoy your time together. Try asking him what he'd like to do one weekend and see where that leads. Who knows, you may develop some other interests because of him as we'll.

What you do is not as important as being together. It's a morbid thought but nobody is promised tomorrow. JMHO but I like what Shawn posted and it got me going.
Title: Re: Frustrated with Dad
Post by: T Folts on March 16, 2013, 10:51:00 AM
Kyle, beg borrow or steal a used bow in the low 40's and just take him stump shooting, I'll bet that lights his fire. No stress just the two of or even some buddys so he can shoot the breeze while stumping.
I would do anything to be able to have my father join me in the woods.

Terry
Title: Re: Frustrated with Dad
Post by: xtrema312 on March 16, 2013, 01:14:00 PM
Stump shooting or informal back yard stuff would be the way to go I think.  League shooting with others that have been shooting a long time could be a little intimidating, and that takes the fun out of it. Start with it just being you and dad.  

It would also be a good idea to do form work right off to get he shot correct. This should be easier with the lighter bow.  Doing the form work right off will help him get shooting decent faster and will take the pressure off of having to hit something when he gets started.